The Lotus Eater

I think this may be one of my favorite websites in the history of the internet. Be sure to check out the commentary on the Swedish Royal Family.

I may be throwing my hat into the ring a little late, but as op-ed columnists are still re-hashing L’Affaire du Quail (see Dan Froomkin’s 2/21 WaPo column The Buckshot’s Here), I thought I’d contribute my own two cents.

THIS IS SOME ILLUMINATI BULLSHIT.

Pray, what do I mean? Well, I mean that there is obviously some insidious conspiracy running every aspect of public affairs in this country.

Dick Cheney is, by most international standards, a war criminal. He is linked to war profiteering, torture in secret concentration camps, intelligence fixing, national security breaches, domestic spying–you can choose you favorite allegation. And while these connections fall in the category of “known unknowns” because the fourth estate appears to respect his privacy in these relatively unimportant matters, his involvment in a hunting accident has provoked media scrutiny of an intensity that is usually reserved for hotel break-ins and blowjobs. Bruce Reed of Slate called the event 2/11!

Ok, ok, we get it. This incident speaks to the pattern of secrecy that pervades all the Vice President’s behavior, particularly in relation to those war crimes discussed above. But, for the love of reason, why can’t the media scrutinize the actual crimes? And that gets me back to the Illuminati.

It’s obvious that everyone is in cahoots, cahooting from sea to shining sea. Our secret masters under the Himalayas obviously want to keep their government in power and the rest of us in a state of confusion and cognitive dissonance. Here is my assessment of this latest story: The White House is in political trouble, on the verge of lame duck status. This whole shooting incident is manufactured, diverting attention away from issues of greater importance as well as the beleaguered Prez . The “liberal” media latches onto the story like a orca whale to a penguin, and makes numerous calls for Cheney’s resignation, linking the incident to his other scandals. Meanwhile, the right-wing pundits correctly blast their favorite target for baseless accusations, and pave the road for making all accusations against Cheney look baseless. AH-HA!

Now, we see how we are being kept in check. It’s the Illuminati, I am sure of it.